Tomorrow I am off until 10/25. This is the time I am taking to get myself educated on legitimate things, things that require my effort and an outcome.
I got a little further into one affiliate marketing thing. I wouldn't say it was a gimmick, exactly, but what it does do is something very circular in its logic and conclusion. Namely the goal is to get people signed up for education programs. I thought they might diversify their offerings around before suggesting a program that helps you sell other people on your success, but this is once again another example of being pushed to sell a product before you can experience it. Wouldn't it be fucking fantastic to get the real deal and get to experience something before being pushed to the ends of the earth to sell it? That is my issue with literally almost every pyramid scheme or scammy sales opportunity--NONE of them want to allow you the opportunity to enjoy and see success in the products offered without elevating their opportunity in your face.
Wouldn't it be nice to do something like that? There are companies that offer exactly what Mr. Force does--the shipping fulfillment and customer service--companies like ...
Today I am spending time with B...this B who has been my most consistent advocate in Colorado, the family I never had--she invites us to Thanksgiving Christmas and New Year's every, year just about. We're pretty isolated from the world, me and Don--we have very few people close to us and even now we feel kind of like un-tethered things. I am trying these other little things I've mentioned to get us a little more, no really a LOT more freedom than we've had and as a result I've been a bit distracted in my own world.
Prior to my new ventures and interests I was spending an inordinate amount of time studying things like ghosts and contemplating things beyond my understanding, namely life after death. This is what I spent a good portion of my summer doing...reading and watching and trying to conceptualize the idea of spirit separated from religion. I have told many people that I don't feel like I need the gimmick of a god or anything too organized behind written scripture to believe the things I do. I suppose a lot of what woke this up for me was watching that damn show Monica the Medium, which ...
Ugh. I did it again...yesterday's drinking fiasco was my own fault. Alyse and I hung up for a while and a can of wine sounded just fine. When Don got home we were supposed to just drink the 4 box and be done...but with such small quantity dissemination it didn't seem like enough so getting another few cans seemed like a genius idea.
But you can see it in my face...the downward draw of things. The puff, the unclear eyes, the general gross face you get when you drink too much, which I do.
It's a drag but alcohol and sugar are terrible vices for me I would like to cleanly kick to the curb. Just need more practice. Just need to say no tonight even since I don't work tomorrow but Sunday I do I need to stop blaming Don or either one of us and just make the damn decision for myself.
See this? Terrible visage...bahhhhh
