There's been some tickling lately in my head--it sometimes manifests in weird deja-vu moments, sometimes it's me waking up at midnight or two or three am, usually predicated by a night drinking I should not have had. This has happened over a splattering of the first two weeks, but tomorrow it's a 60 day program we're on-something we haven't done since 2018-when a certain husband I know fell off a cruise ship after drinking too much and we vowed off drinking for what ended up being only a few weeks-but was still good practice. Since we moved east a far less often thing, once a week or so but still too much at a time. Right now I need to just stop for a few reasons, the least of which is new rustling for talk about my surgery again, and we all know that's best avoided, but even still that might require some other intervention, because unlike in times past, we are utterly alone and have been for 17 months-save one trip from Alyse and B, it's been just utterly isolating. I don't even know if I remember how to talk to people anymore-I've been changing my work ...
My husband is the best--he just wants me to be happy and maybe write-make a little money but nothing crazy. Sometimes I feel like I fail him while I'm failing me--there'd be some freedom an income would bring me because I am possibly the cheapest wife. I try to keep my expenses including groceries at under $500 a month. That includes random grocery trips and my Ka-chava delivery so I'm really not a mess of a person asking for too much though I'll say I did get some skincare with that $500 last month.
So last week I hit 10k at least 4 days of the week and lost 3 lbs. It's not awful but I will add I failed again today because I was napping for a good part of the afternoon. I'm sure I didn't even hit half but there's always time to stop failing until you succeed, so I will keep on.
I didn't look to see if anything has changed here, but we'll go look again later. I see I have visitors at least but don't know how to see who the fuck you are.
Maybe I'll link a tiktok tomorrow.
Hmm on that.
It was a classic case of Takotsubo cardiomyopathy, or broken heart syndrome, her doctors say. The rare but dangerous form of heart disease is triggered by intense emotional or physical stress when a sudden flood of hormones is believed to stun the heart into pumping less efficiently. Good thing that from one of the stories I read said only 1 out of 10 might end up with that being a permanent thing, but you wonder what kind of heart damage might have been reported already. It also is expected you might experience another issues within 10 years as well based on historical cases. I am sorry anyone came to find this just searching for those kinds of things-certainly having heart issues is something I'm almost too familiar with-however I've been able to come out of it pretty well-adjusted as a person and possibly even more agreeable and positive because of it, this because that's the attitude I tend to adopt. I don't feel great about living in this country or any of the things coming down the line possibly-you kind of hope America opens up to just even the general possibility that having ...
