echo no-yo

Published May 27th, 2020 in 2020 | No Comments »

Ugh, world. Why do you have to fuck with me universe--I feel so lucky as is it would seem teasing out extra is a definite risk. My most recent echo came to fuck me with a nice dose of holy shit, you might have just a year to live to, holy shit, they might want to get this done this summer, to holy shit, I might want to push it out a year or two. If you don't know me well, one of my mantras is--"life always happens when you're making other plans."

So now, well let me explain first what happened. So I had my little virtual follow-up to my echo which was fine, though they kind of slipped in a nasty piece of news in the last few minutes. I started my question with--well, I read the report, didn't look too alarming to me but what do I know? I guess I know nothing, actually, so won't try that again. The, where did you get your surgeries questions came again to town and she suggested we have a surgical consult because it appears St Jude has left me scarred and needs a replacement. I asked her how ...

questions, answers and superstitions

Published May 24th, 2020 in 2020 | No Comments »

I am a slight superstitious, I guess you could say, because things sometime have a way of running off the lines of the paths I've tried to set up. Clearly this is not just something I am afflicted with right now since so many are now joining me, but yes, Don is home, and no, neither one of us appears to have the virus though I've gotten a slight ballsy lately and have gone to the grocery store twice inside, over the past few weeks. It's more about ensuring his convenience and comfort, because previously my go-to solution was order it, pick it up with my trunk popped open and go home to disinfect.

Going to the grocery store right now is its own perfect traumatic experience--people are generally afraid and tend not to invade pockets of space for very long at all--it's like an adult game of lava where everyone is kind of qberting up the aisles, everyone is in a mask with varying degrees of horror and violence implied. Mine is the real deal--looking more like the Bane mask, I've been told, than anything delicate, but it is an N99 so its construction lends to a ...

Category: 2020

88 days

Published May 13th, 2020 in 2020 | 1 Comment »

I haven't seen Don in 88 days as of today. I have been mostly alone since my birthday, which was the day he flew away to his new job. Today he is coming home and part of me was like, hmm....should I write all of my goodbyes now...should I pre-write them for a possible later date? Then the other part of my head is like nahhh...if you write them it might turn the tide more towards Covid coming into your house. If you simply believe it is all okay, it will be all okay. It will have to be okay. Now we aren't living in some super dense city, but unlike a good part of America, I don't believe the virus discriminates on party lines or rural vs city--whomever has it doesn't do a pre-registration of being a city person only allowed in city places or a rural person never going to any city.

I did consider the full 14 day quarantine for him but he has promised me he has worn his mask just as vigilantly as I have, but there is also the fact that I am deathly afraid of the virus so I would never ever ...

Category: 2020

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