I have a real affinity for the 1920's, the style and its incarnations have always made a really sweet and memorable impression on me and here we are again. I also have been saying for a little bit I've got maybe the decade left, primarily because of the whole menopause factor and the complications affecting all that hormonal shit, a somewhat suspect heart and some others impediments that have made the idea of future and time a novelty sometimes not worth considering.
So today I did a few things I did promise I would do for myself starting this year. Given I am basically retired for the moment anyways, I get to do the things I always wanted to do, and I get to take the classes I wanted to take vs had to take and now I get to basically be the captain of my own ship and do everything I have always wanted with my time. For now, anyways. I have the next few months to make it happen and--so today I found a pretty robust group of classes to take. Next Tuesday I am taking an instagram class because whatever, why not avoid the mistakes so ...
So I have to admit, my webcam ass has not been online since I was in my 20's. I realized that's actually a really weird thing to get over. Now, everyone uses filters and fancy things to make themselves look great. And I am not really ready to do that simply because I don't want to have to learn anything more than I already have to, which is just basic editing of features for length and clarity. I still am a little lost on WP formatting, which I realize I will be able to work on learning later. It just seems that there is always something in the way to my forward movement. Whereas now it is not a job, my mother has harassed me to paint a fucking barn, which is actually going just about as great as you would expect from someone who does art once every few years when their mother commissions or enlists them to do something for her. I realize this new life I am living is pretty free, but there are always obligations. I think I am on version like 6 of this stupid painting fiasco. I don't even want to do ...
Man it is easy to realize you have spent hours on Facebook or social media and gotten absolutely nothing done. So I am starting to recognize that is a terrible plan when you do get that time back you always dreamed of having.
I do think I certainly feel I have some positive contributions to generally offer in terms of directives to information that many might find useful. But I also realize it might not actually be helping anyone. I think it sometimes, as my husband says, makes me feel like I am happy to be right. That the time I am spending trying to assuage my righteousness might be better spent on my own projects, and that is absolutely true. So--although I certainly do seem to have something to say about a lot of things, that my time would be better utilized in the production and creation of my own life and goals. It is super hard NOT to contribute to the national dialogue sometimes, but I am recognizing that it certainly isn't going to secure me a heck of a lot of favor with really anyone. My husband gets pissed at me, and certainly I get ...
