Last time I flew to California was in September, getting back 3 days before the giant fiasco. Fiasco death screaming murder. Crying. Hard to believe it’s so close behind. Nipping at the heals kind of close. The fucking garbage is starting to stink. Sitting there for days outside the window, flies procreating inside the bags,…
Mark showed up today. We had quite the fiasco on Friday finding a hospital to give him an appointment. Basically it involved going to three hospitals (beth israel, bellvue and harlem hospital). Appartently living 15 blocks from a hospital is not as good as living over 70 away. So Harlem hospital gave him an appointment…
My new plight, concern, is for the greater good, the lesser person, not completely whole because of a broken mind. or perhaps just broke. I researched artist grants, aid for people who didn’t have what it takes to be whole. Those of us who have nothing to offer in terms of monetary summalogy get the…
So Francis pointed out something to me. today. That was itterated to me by mark. but was never really too evident. obvious. until today. Schizophrenia. Schizoid tendencies. So abundant. Fresh like open wounds to the point that he’s weeping, and somewhere in the back corners of my mind I am weeping, too. Afraid of. Not…
mark is sleeping in my bed. I don’t know where I am sleeping yet. The living room will be too full of people to comfortably sleep there. I have always been able to maintain control. situations. things. we have a really smashing answering machine message right now. Of course my mother calls and remarks in…
A knock came on my window yesterday afternoon, the illustrious vectorman was back in the house, consequently, back in my life. To what extent one never knows. I started remembering snowstorms in Brooklyn, torn down loves. trust. fate. Spent much of yesterday afternoon, crouched down in the park, drawing diagrams with him..diagrams of sticks and…
so yea. This new friend. Hanging out with him makes me feel a little less meat-like in terms of the usual come ons and chilling experiences I have encountered in my life…Most of the time, I’ll hang out with someone and they spend the majority of the time pawing, haphazard attempts at jumping in my…
sitting here, brooklyn. the sun is shining so fucking strong and the skies are clearer and less muddy than usual. I have keys to go to get coffee and come back. I think I might do that in a bit. Dreams slippin past my conscious memory again. They are so strange lately. Super high fi…
My summer has been scooting by at an unnatural pace. people people people. situations situations situations. It’s hard for me to really organize what is going on lately in my brain, the way my mind shelves priorities, people, things, into the back corners of nothingness, to be forgotten until I decided to consciously remember them….
So I was wondering. And we all have the same eternal question burning in our minds…What about the stache, cater lip, hairy upper, what the fuck ever. It freaks me out. Lots of motherfuckers around here seem to think it’s cool. I just don’t. It’s like a mullet for the lazy. More after my little…
