I think I was becoming something other than human while I existed in my dim basement apartment before. Now I wake up with the sun creasing my eyes. On occasion I try to rub it out, wash it away like a stray lash, but these times are rare.
Francis ran off to do laundry, a task which is both aggravating for her today, and happy for me. There are bad things that can happen to your pants when you don't wear underwear, so I shipped them off just in time.
My friend, I discovered, lives a frisky one minute walk away. We are going to run around this evening, walking and bar hopping in its literal sense, gathering information and pit stops for my job applying over the next week or so. Usually I am the one who utilizes the program I developed, "Import-a-friend" which entails luring the unsuspecting bored masses to my neck of the woods with promises of jewels and pretty shiny things. As hard as it is to believe, it is a program that shows the desired results. Usually the girls end up becoming disillusioned and insane, stemming from aspects of their personalities that I cannot even ...
I have been spending a shitload of time inside myself lately, examining, recycling, assuming new mes, wrapping them up and putting them away for rainy days.
Because it's a full moon, I feel very scabbed today, wanna rip up my skin, and throw it away.
I noticed tonight as I frisked around on foot that the surmounting anger I feel is always about the gravitational pull, and all that.
for some people, it is powerful. for me it is paralyzing because I feel both violent and sensitive, like an out-of-control circus on the verge of fists flying and a flood of tears.
Alpha Calm, Francis, I remarked today. I have these very lucid messed up dreams about infomercials I generally fall asleep to and wake up excited about mid-pitch. I honestly have gone so far as to leave my house when I didn't have a phone, go around the corner and call in a raincheck on some Japanese Pokemon cards that the Home Shopping Club rep assured would make me rich. All because I was lucidly dreaming and gently being brainwashed into a rich state of mind because the salespeople are just that good.
Alpha Calm had me hooked just on the idea. The bullet ...
except myself, of course. I tried to finagle the chinatown bus (the ten dollar express ride to nyc) but it seems as if the insane and crazy have decided to go risk life and limb to go protest the crazy republicans. It's interesting to me that they picked such a venue to try and pimp their ideas out so publicly. In a city like that it's akin to rounding up a bunch of child molesters to parade them around like heroes.
Egh, republicans, don't get me started on that.
The point is that I am stuck in the area, and I cannot return until after the ruckus clears up. I think it's almost strange and disturbing that I have had such bad luck with the boys-the unemotional, mean, manipulative, and have watched my friends flap like frantic fish over their bad relationships, and I have to figure out what kind of definition we will exist under because I am moving not around the block or across the river, but a smashing 4 hour ride away.
I have decided to let him take over my lease, per say, because it will allow me the safety of thinking that I always have a place to ...
